There are many ways to skin a cat. I own a small label called MAGPIE, and I've done a few things, some people will rip it, but I really have had the best luck with UNITED, www.urpressing.com/ My next release wil be the first time I've gotten them to master and cut the plates, but I feel pretty good about it. I will probably use I Love Imprint, www.iloveimprint.com/ for sleeves and possibly for a CD release coming up. Great guys to work with. As far as t-shirts, stickers and buttons I use Press Press Merch, www.presspressmerch.com/ They are really fast and will do limited runs for cheap. Seriously the easiest people I've worked with, and their t-shirt selection is bitch'n. Their website is bunk, so just e-mail for quotes.
As far as press kits, I had one made with one of my bands, and it didn't do much. Most places don't need them for booking anymore. Sometimes newspapers will request one so they can use a pic, and get background on ya with little leg work. Though a high res. pic on-line with a bio will do the same thing.
I hope this helps. Though from what i can tell there are a million good ways to do all these things. I will say I have never been able to do shirts as cheap as I have been able to with press press merch, and they are quality! So GOOD LUCK!